I’ve only been to a few games in the National Football League. In middle school, I once skipped football practice to watch the Colts beat the Titans in a pre-season game in Nashville. I, young Peyton Manning, didn’t realize that the big names didn’t play in pre-season and was completely shattered when the realization hit me that “The Sheriff” would, in fact, not be playing. That, combined with my coach making me run for skipping practice, left a bad taste in my mouth.
Fast forward to Dec. 24, 2017, and there my family sits at Nissan Stadium to watch a late regular season match-up between the Los Angeles Rams and the Titans. The idea (proposed by my brother, an avid football fan/player that was obviously too young to be scarred by the lack of Peyton Manning on that fateful day all those years ago) was wonderful in theory: a Christmas Eve game that my family could enjoy together.
We had eye-bleed seats (like nosebleeds, but higher), and even that wasn’t terrible until it started raining. I say raining, but in reality, it was so cold that the rain was halfway freezing before it had time to collide with our skin, meaning that every time you blinked it felt like someone was pouring a Route 44 slushie down your back. It was not a pleasant experience.
As you could probably guess, Peyton Manning didn’t show up to this game, either.
I haven’t been to an NFL game since, and I’m not opposed to the idea. That being said, having been at Union these past couple years, there are some strong similarities between the NFL and Union’s own intramural flag football scene.
One thing that fuels both leagues is the rivalries. If the NFL has the Bears v. the Packers and the Steelers v. the Ravens, here at Union you could mix and match any of the fraternities or sororities and have an infinitely more entertaining match-up. If you think it’s awkward to see OBJ line-up against Janoris Jenkins, imagine if the next morning they had to sit next to each other in Old Testament.
Another benchmark of the NFL in the last 10 years has been the dominance of the New England Patriots. When they’re good, they’re champions, and even when they’re terrible, they’re still better than the Miami Dolphins. If you’re looking for something similar here at Union, look no further than the pharmacy teams.
There is nothing like the simultaneous, audible groan of a team looking at their game schedule and seeing that they play the pharmacy. With a roster that resembles Bill Belichick’s dream receiving corps and a seemingly limitless book of pharmaceutical puns, the pharmacy teams will always tend to sit at the top of their division.
In this side by side comparison, we slowly see Union take the lead.
Here is a list of things that Union has that the NFL doesn’t:
- Competent refs (If a biology major with a biblical studies minor can referee better than a full-time official, maybe you’re doing something wrong.)
- Better viewing options (Sure, it’s standing room only, but you also get the full sideline experience.)
- Less concussions (I’m sure you think I meant to say, “no concussions,” but believe me, there are.)
- No stadium music (I can only hear “Seven Nation Army” and “Final Countdown” so many times before it starts to feel less like I’m at a football game and more like I’m at a 12-year-old’s roller-skating birthday party.)
While the NFL may have higher caliber athletes, billions of more dollars in revenue, timeless logos and color schemes and a 100-year history, intramural flag football has something they don’t: spirit.
People at Union are passionate about their flag football. It isn’t some elite league where the best and brightest compete, but it is the only place where a 270-pound guy like me can line-up at slot receiver one play and as quarterback the next.
Some of my best memories in college are on those intramural fields, both watching and playing. If football isn’t your sport, then you’re probably in the same boat as half the people playing, but feel free to join in or spectate. You’ll have just as much fun as you would in an NFL game.